Unchanged and changed

I have had many homes and yet have remained homeless. I have traveled to many places and yet remained strangely still. The people I have met, the people I am yet to meet- I have been involved with them ; I have been taken in- into fragments of lives, loves , joys and sadnesses.
I have tasted the joy of several homecomings and I have tasted the sadness of many a leave-taking.
I have loved and I have lost.
I have been loved and lost that too.
The many skies and the many roofs that have sheltered me ,
They have stolen from me too.
The seas I have crossed and the paths I have traversed-
Ancient cities , older deserts,
Towering skyscrapers ,immense mountains,
Noisy bustle,profound silences,
They have all become a part of me .
And yet,I remain still-
Unchanged and changed.

There was her and there was me

I stood this evening at the ISRO signal at rush hour waiting to cross over to the other side - a busy part of town no matter what time of day.I stood there with my dinner shopping hanging from one hand and a heavy handbag hanging from the other.A strange kind of exhaustion had overtaken me from the lack of sleep of the previous night, the long commute and a day spent staring at a computer screen trying to arrange Bourdieu and Baudrillard and Rajagopal in some semblance of order for my report. As I watched the two-wheelers,three-wheelers and four-wheelers whiz by , I suddenly became aware of her standing a few feet away from me. She had the same look I imagine I had on my face- a mix of exhaustion and alertness.There was also a strange manginess ( for want of a better phrase) mixed in with the dignified serenity of her bearing.It was apparent from certain rather obvious signs that she was a young mother with very young offspring. I wondered where she'd left them- a warm, safe place perhaps, while she went to provide for them or whatever errand it was that she was returning from. I wondered too for a moment about all the other young working mothers in this city.

Would I ever be able to leave my babies in the care of perfect strangers? Perhaps , I would.It's all circumstance after all isn't it? But then this one probably had some degree of trust in someone. Be that as it may , there we were, two females quite exhausted at the end of the day and I could almost bet that she wished too that this mad rush around us would just stop for a tiny minute. But then, things were what they were. I had a quiet apartment waiting for me and she probably had somewhere equally comforting to get to. Besides, there were the little ones of course-always a priority.

A dance began between us. We'd take a step forward and then as we noticed the approach of another mad man on a bike or in a car or an erratic three-wheeler, we'd step back. We'd try again and back again. A certain rhythm was established. We were looking at each other and yet trying not to make it obvious.We were companionable in our mutual predicament and yet wary.It never hurts to be careful I always think.

There was a weariness seeping in.My bags felt heavier by the minute and all I really wanted was to get home and to my couch. Suddenly, one of those inexplicable lulls in traffic occurred and taking a deep breath I stepped onto the road. She followed suit almost immediately. I took three more steps and she did the same. Suddenly I noticed another mad man headed toward us on a scooter. I quickened my pace while glancing back at her. Would she follow too? Would she make it? I reached the other side and looked back. No, she'd decided to turn around and go back. Perhaps, prudence really was best under the circumstances. I'd reached the other side and stood watching to make sure she made it too. I was compelled to almost.There was something about her.Finally,she took the plunge. Slow , quick steps led her to where I was standing.She'd made it too.

We looked at each other for a moment and then turned and headed in opposite directions and with a wag of her tail she was gone.